Exclusive! First time ever ... audio recording of HMRC stopping a shopper returning to UK 2010. Pt 1

This shopper has been stopped 9 times in a 10 year period. He has never lost his goods. Each time he's stopped he pushes HMRC a little further to test the limits he can go to (that does not refer to the amount of tobacco he brings). This is only Part 1 of the story of this stop. Part 2 is currently being processed to highlight the voices and remove as much as possible background noises and personal data. lt is not a short process ... don't think it's like CSI Miami because it isn't! lt takes forever.

l really believe this is a first because l can't find anything like it on the net. Some of you will have seen the "reality" tv show Border Force. Now listen to a factual account of our Border Patrol aka HMRC aka UKBA as it really is

Most of all listen to how someone confronts these bullies and doesn't back down despite being 'arrested' ... possibly twice!.


Feel free to link to this post or download the clip and use as you wish. The more the merrier.

Update 2 .... oop's exceeded download limit. 

Update 3 .... Should be OK now :)

Update 4 .... Now on Youtube HERE and HERE.  Had to split it because of Youtube limits.

Spread it round folks :) 

Update 5 .... Part 2 will take a few days and am away this weekend but will finish it as fast as l can. lncidentally, l found Youtube to be pants ... it is so so slow uploading and processing. Be patient, part 2 will come. Thanks for all the comments. :) 

Update 6 .... The man himself 


  1. F'ing epic, can't wait for part 2. That guy's got some balls!

  2. Brilliant brilliant post. I would love to meet the gentleman involved, he showed the scumbags for what they are. It might be worth my while buying a dictaphone for the future.


  3. Karl, e-mail your address


  4. is it a bird? is it a plane? No, it's Tobaccoman! the new superhero! 4 against 1 and he trounced them. Fucking great!

  5. Terrific !!!! I await part two salivating !!!!!!!!!

  6. Calm, cool, collected and in control. Truly impressive, kudos to the man.

  7. This Geezer was well within his rights for what he said to these twats

  8. This Is What I`ve had to deal with lol lol lol My brother is a Customs Officer and I used to tell him that One day, he`ll come across some one like this, Listen to the recording Its Brilliant lol lol lol

  9. Ha ha ha ha ha ha, my sides hurt from laughing!

    Someone has got to put this up on Youtube. l wish l knew how but l don't. Anyone?

    This has to go global, it's so bloody good.

  10. Quote "do you have leg irons?" LOL LOL LOL

  11. Coolhand Luke or what! SH is that his mate at the end? l've played it a couple of times and you hear "hey ho" and a reply "hey". Now THAT'S cool!

  12. i want part 2 now gimme gimme gimme xxx

  13. Congratulations Smoking Hot

    Spartan 00:35, you will find that you will have downloaded the mp3 into your temporary internet files "argument-final-3" which you can manipulate at will including using all or part of it as the soundtrack to a Youtube upload.

    I'll wait for version 2 and repost it via the blogger link on the audio.
    "Are you Detaining Me"? As recently examined by Old Holborn, and yes it works with the Police so should with Customs Officers too.
    I note that he also refuses to respond to "do you understand?"

  14. This is superb. Not just topical and seriously helpful, which is the main point, but he's made it humerous and fun to listen to as well.
    Full marks to the gent responsible.
    And nil points to our great MSM and TV companies who should be doing this sort of undercover reporting.

  15. you dont get that on the tv programme custums uk. bloody brilliant

  16. Excellent post, and I have linked to it here. Hope you don't mind :) Non-smoker supporting freedom under the law.

    As others have said, can't wait for Part 2.

  17. Very impressive and informative. The gentleman refuses to respond to UKBA's needs,wants and requests. None of these are enforceable by law.

    The gentleman certainly knows his rights whereas the customs officers become increasingly unsure of theirs as the incident unfolds.

    lnterestingly even when they arrest him they are unwillingly to actually lay hands on the gentleman and resort to simple threats. The custody officer requested by them does not make an appearance. One has to wonder why? Perhaps he decided that this was not something he wanted to be involved in?

    People assume that customs officers have infinite powers. This gentleman has exposed these as myths. l take my hat off to him.

    DL LeGrave

  18. Brilliant!

    It was fascinating to hear someone walking the walk AND talking the talk. He tied up four officers for 30 minutes each (so far) which is two hours, all over nothing.

    In my book, he got it absolutely right. He stated his objections and then repeated them, and repeated them, and repeated them. When we say no, it blows them away.

    We should all do this all the time and everywhere we go. They will soon learn that we know our rights and we are fully prepared to exercise them.

    Good man!! Looking forward to part 2.


  19. l would like to add that l found the fact that the gentleman asked for the impending questioning to be recorded but the customs officers were reluctant to do so. l find this enlightning but also extremely worrying.

    ln this day and age of cctv that records image and sometimes sound of virtually every move the public makes, it speaks volumes that customs officers do not want to be recorded.

    ln my view this can only be because the tactics used against people shopping in the EU are not entirely legitimate. What other reason could there possibly be for all this secrecy?

    We would all be wise to follow this gentleman's approach. Dictaphones are very cheap and discreet with capabilities of recording over 300hrs. No longer do they have tapes but are completely solid state and thus silent. l firmly believe that one should always use them when coming into contact with any of the authorities or their representatives.

    Afterall, if they have nothing to hide, they have nothing to fear.

    DL LeGrave

  20. I take my cap off to this man. He tied the customs officers involved in knots and it's so obvious that he knows more about the law than all the officers involved put together. Brilliant!!

    sandrajean (F2C member)

  21. Peanut ... yes that is his friend. He also got stopped but his customs officer folded immediately and so that recording is not of much interest. He did stay in the passenger terminal though and kept bringing coffee to his friend regardless of him being in the secure area. Customs officers were having enough problems so they probably didn't want to increase them by saying anything. You'll hear him bringing in the coffee in pt2 l think.

  22. I wish I had recorded my 3 hour 48 minute
    chat show with a friendly UKBA person at Hull
    in August.As many of my fellow fighters in F2C
    and the northern command will testify,a long natter is my cup of tea. After 3 hours of trying to trap me into contradictory statements
    the poor customs chappy and his pigtailed Valkyrie henchfemme got drawn into discussing
    my outgoings on vets fees including the cost of
    feline insulin and throwaway syrnges.Just has I was going into the details of flea treatment,
    my Amber Leaf was rammed into my bag and I was
    promptly sent on my way.I asked for a copy of
    the 28 page transcript or some sort of Notice but
    all I got was a finger pointing to the exit.

    Last of the Summer Leaf
    I bend my knee and bow my head only unto a
    Supreme Being,, the rest can get stuffed

    No retreat
    No surrender
    Take no prisoners

    Western Goth

  23. Err, he is arrested yet they deny his interview to be recorded? Shurely shome mishtake.

    I know that UKBA tend to be a law unto themselves, but that surely contradicts a couple of bigguns.

  24. Customs are used to people doing everything they say but this guy just said No and they had no idea what to do. Even when they threatened him he just laughed. Bet they'll remember that day!!!!! lol

  25. This is fantastic. Poor sods back down out of intimidation and having paraphrases thrown at them by these officers too much.

    Funny how they didn't want to be recorded. They knew they didn't have a leg to stand on if any of it was on tape.

  26. Dick ... they read him his rights but then didn't have a clue what to do. The power of 'No' eh? :)

  27. Hey he read them their rights first! Nice touch!

  28. Gonzo

    l listened to it again and you're correct. He bloody does! Ha ha ha

  29. Class, absolutely tops this is, cant wait for part two

  30. Playing them at their own game, well done

  31. That is so sweet. l'm deffo going to get one of those recorders. This guy is really something else! F'ing sheer class!

  32. This needs to be on youtube :)

  33. When part 2 is published please forward the whole lot to TAXUD-UNIT-C3@ec.europa.eu. Suzanne Tams at the Eurpean Commission is investigating 'UK provisions on the seizure of tobacco for hand rolling bought by private individuals in another EU state' This includes HMRC's restriction of 3 brands sales' in Belgium and Luxembourg (Amber Leaf, GV, Cutters).If you have been affected e-mail. Quote case DE/ACC/10/CHAP 3275

  34. YouTube. Definitely.

    Would be well worth making a complete transcript too, together with 'commentary' notes as appropriate.

  35. Brilliant, i`d love to do a baccie run with this guy!!!

  36. Where did this take place?

  37. Dirty ... l think it's Hull judging by what he says at the beginning and is tied to this post


  38. Can you upload the mp3 to somewhere else please?
    The account has reached it's download limit and is not playing now.

  39. Roll on part 2, top stuff..

  40. smoking hot, smuggling arse who gives genuine travellers a bad name. embarrasing - get a life you dick. Thought the officers showed great restraint i would have knocked you OUT.

  41. To Anon@18.45
    Sir,Madam or whatever in between
    Unless you are playing the devil's advocate may
    I suggest a remedy for your obvious disorder,
    please crawl elsewhere in cyberspace where loners ,yonners ,creeps,backstabbers,Quislings,
    Judases,turkeys,jerk-offs and white feather
    devotees do mix well in their abject solitude.
    As for the nice officers showing restraint,pity
    they have shown so much restraint at letting
    thousands if not millions of terrorists,murderers,drug pushers,pimps and pickpockets slip into the UK.

    Buzz Lighthouse's Civil Partner

  42. Anon 18.45 ... you have the qualifications for a certain profession, in fact probably over qualified.

    So, you'd have left this passenger and then set off to find me??? You assume l was there?

    Were you one of these officers perhaps? ... or a colleague?

    Terrible isn't it, when the public turn surveillance around and use it on our 'watchers'?

    I suggest you get used to it ... this is only the beginning! More and more people will be doing it and if l am partly instrumental in that ... good!

    The veil of secrecy surrounding illegal and unjust tactics used by UKBA/HMRC will then be exposed for all to see.

  43. That's great SH. Reminds me of a fun time. Hee hee xxxxx

  44. Smoking hot When will part 2 be out I loved it.
    "Who Audits The Auditer" LOL.

  45. Wonderful. I wish I could keep my cool as well as that. Are there classes?

  46. Anon 18.45 is a customs officer hiding his id like they do all the time with their flak jackets. Hee hee xxx

  47. Anonymous said...
    smoking hot, smuggling arse who gives genuine travellers a bad name. embarrasing - get a life you dick. Thought the officers showed great restraint i would have knocked you OUT.

    And then you would have been guilty of assault.

    Excellent though, SH, good to hear an account of someone actually understanding the Law as written and using to stand up to petty authority.

  48. Great Stuff, Sounds like Hull, and yes they do pull people at Random, I bet they will be a bit more careful now, this is going viral, it's appearing on Facebook, so those with Facebook accounts get sharing the YouTube link

  49. Fab. cant wait for part 2!!!

  50. You sound like a very nasty obnoxious person, you could have answered a few simple questions and left. What a dickhead!

  51. what a muppet - did not give the officers a chance to even speak to him. Sec 78 CEMA allows officers to stop and question persons entering and leaving the UK - if he answered the quaetions without being a tool then he would probably been allowed to go.

  52. Not with 540 pouches he wouldn`t, HMRC are thieves, full stop.

  53. you guys are fools. No one gives a toss about what a bunch of baccy smugglers have to say. This guy was an idiot. The officers did a good job and were restrained given his verbal bullshit. There are more important things to worry about in the world than being stopped by UKBA (NOT HMRC YOU IDIOTS - THEY DO NOT WORK ON THE BORDER CONTOLD AND HAVE NOT FOR OVER A YEAR. IF YOU ARE GOING TO MOAN THEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE MOANING ABOUT)

  54. @ Anonymous at 1937.

    Most people who read this site are not smugglers but European smokers. Have you heard about free trade within the European Union. The politicians of this country only wants us in Europe when it suits them, especially their friends jumping on the gravy train that is the EU.

  55. 19.37 you must be either a member of the corrupt group known as mp's/mep's who are the single most bunch of self asserted pompus twats ever to grace the once great country's hall's of goverment or a member of the poodle to the above mentioned tossers the border farce, there is no other democratic country in world that treats its own citizens on return to the country of there birth with such actions last seen in the third reich as our own...i have yet to see a french national on return to his country get stopped have his vehicle stripped to the bone have his personel legally bought items stolen off state controled robbers and have his car stolen in the middle of the night then made to make there own way home with small children/older folks in tow...enough is enough

  56. jeffski -wake and and smell the roses. You are as fool.

  57. The point is not whether the guy was an irritating arsehole or not, whether the officers were restrained or not, whether he was being reasonable or not. The point is that in this country we are meant to uphold the law. This guy knows the law, and the officers, it appears, either do not or are ignoring it - I assume at the behest of their masters, who see the loss of tobacco revenue as a national crisis (brought on, I might add, by our membership of the EU). All he is asking them to do is to follow the law of the land. The law is the law, and it applies to everyone, even customs/revenue/border agency officers. Why should anyone criticise someone who is merely asking that the officers behave lawfully?

  58. 19.37 , you're a complete twat. lf you lot didn't cover up your id then maybe more people would know who you are but you prefer being anon, don't you? Cos' you operate like this it's obvious except to moron why SH links UKBA to HMRC. I hope this is the first of many recordings of you thieving bastards!

  59. Thank G_d people like you have the guts to satnd up against these Nazis.


  60. Great listening to this but from the point of view of the customs officers it is all in a days work. The guy suffered harassment and loss of his time, that's a result for them. The only way to turn it around would be to sue them for wrongful arrest.

    Unless of course, more and more people kept on doing it and clogging up their little conveyor belt.

  61. To those who applauded, thanks. I thought it was good too, but then I would, wouldn't I? Seriously, thanks guys.

    To those who thought it unecessary for me to be so objectionable, I will waste my time by explaining.

    I used to be reasonable with them. "Just doing their job, aren't they?" After three seizures, (all overturned on appeal), I realised that their politeness was fake. They are thieves.

    Since I started getting bolshy with them, I've never had a seizure of my goods. You'd think that by irritating them I'd make it worse for myself, but it turns out not to be so. While fighting them I have seen others with far less than me, being cooperative and getting theirs seized.

    On this particular occasion I had nine times the "guideline quantity". Of tobacco, that is, and I don't smoke rollies! They were all for gifts. With a story like that I was not being awkward for fun, I was putting my money where my mouth is. I knew that I wouldn't actually be leaving there without a search, so it was necessary to show them who is boss, first.

    Never fall for the nice guy routine! They ARE out to rob you. Always record it, they WILL lie. Do not accept "I'll write it in my notebook". As you will see from part two, some of them can't read their own writing. That's why I make her read it out to me at the end, (for the tape!)

    If they seize your goods, they will suggest that you just walk away. DON'T! Without paperwork or receipt, they can pocket the lot.

    Every time I get stopped, I push them further. It's the only way to find the limit. I will end up in a cell eventually. And I'll still win.

    On this occasion, they un-arrested me before the interview. (part two). I now realise that this allowed them to refuse to record it. Next time I shall immediately walk again til they re-arrest me.

    Once again, thanks for your comments. I'm kinda new to the blogosphere, and hadn't realised how gratifying the feedback is!

    Smokey will in due course, I hope, oblige us by processing and posting a couple of other gems I've got.

    Don't trust uniforms! They have been badly devalued by giving them to thieves and liars and idiots.

  62. I can't wait to hear part two.

    Funny how those who threaten violence or resort to insults always appear in blogs as "Anonymous".

  63. Incidentally, the point of getting them to record it, even though I am already doing so?

    If they record it, they will behave themselves. I'm not looking to get them in trouble by producing the tape in court, I just want them to obey their own law and leave me alone.

    Okay, I would like to get them into trouble! But they definitely started it!

    HMCE, HMRC, UKBA: changing their name isn't fooling me. They are still the same shower, pulling the same scam. A complete disgrace.

  64. Top man. Look forward to the follow up.

  65. How about making smoking into a recognised religion (Like Jedi Knights)?
    I believe that unless I smoke tobacco every hour I will be possessed by evil spirits.

  66. ha ha very ammusing, i bet this chap fights alot of winning arguments, prehaps traffic wardens should be next in the firing line..

  67. As it happens...

    I've got a very amusing video of my local traffic warden attempting to stop me filming him. Smokey has promised to post it on here sometime. (I'd previously trashed this TW's evidence against me in court. He doesn't like me much. Two C3POs also gave evidence. I won, of course.)

  68. Zaphold, if i had heroes you would be my hero....when someone is an ignorant and arrogant moron adding a uniform on them transforms them immediately into aggressive ignorant bullies...and disgraces the uniform and the law they are supposed to uphold...GOOD JOB THEY MET SOMEONE LIKE YOU....i bet you DIDN'T make their day ahahahahah...way to go babe


"In the eyes of the Tribunal the review letter contained several preconceptions, prejudgments and non-sequiturs"

"the absurdity of this reason is demonstrated by simply stating it"

"We therefore find that Mr Sked misdirected himself as to the Policy in carrying out the review and his decision is therefore one that no reasonable review officer could have arrived at."

... commonly known here at N2D as 'Skeds' ... that is to say these are Judges comments regarding UKBA Review Officer Ian Sked's reasons for rejecting peoples appeals against seizures.

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